Surgery

Here I was in early December, so excited about the prospects of a new job. Working in an OR as a tech. I went in for the position and shadowed someone for a day to 'try' the job out, and just knew this was the position for me! I was so excited. I even had inside help, a friend who got me in the door and was sure I had the job. Then BOOM! I get a letter from the hospital saying 'We regret to inform you...." you know the rest. Oh my heart was devastated. I could eat taste and drink this job, I knew it was for me. What happened Lord? Don't you know this is the kind of work I'd be good at? Couldn't you have just given this one thing to me? I hear the whine going on in my head...... but Lord, I've done this and this in your name, and you couldn't just give me this one teensy little thing I've asked for. Another set-back and disappointment. So it appeared to me.
During the same month I had a Doctor's appointment, and was told I needed to schedule a major surgery ASAP. I put it off, because I just knew I had this job in the palm of my hand. Now, I didn't. My youngest child had just married in October, and my husband and I were so looking forward to this season in life, time for us to expand what our dreams were. The ones you had to put aside for years while you chose to raise children and take care of all the family responsibilities before your own dreams. We did a good job as a team with our 4 children, now adults, with spouses of their own, and 2 with children. Now it was our turn! Thus, the desire to get the hospital job.
OK Lord, I get it, you didn't want me to get the job, because you knew I'd need at least 4 weeks off for a surgery, and starting a new job and asking for a huge amount of time off would not work. The downside of the surgery was that I would be basically a couch potato or a computer-head. No lifting, standing for long periods of time, no physical activity, not even to push a vacuum cleaner. I know this sounds like an ideal situation, but I have a tendency to be a neat-Nick. I had no one at home now to do these things, laundry, loading the woodstove, cooking dinner.
Plan 2 starts forming in my head, I probably need this time off. It's a slow time at my job anyway, so actually Lord, you're right, this is the opportune time to schedule the surgery. We'll figure out the game plan as we go along. God is so good. He allowed for one of my sons to stop by my house for the first week and stoke the fires of the woodstove until my husband could arrive home. And, BTW Lord, there really won't be that much mess, now will there? It's only the two of us now, so stop fretting Kim! The only set-back to this set-back was that I have a 2 month old grandson, whom I can't hold or carry, and a 2 year old granddaughter who can't understand why her Granny doesn't pick her up for kisses. My children really do understand I have to take it easy, so they are helping this transitional time as much as possible, by being helpful and understanding of me having to set aside 'grandma's job for awhile.
Instead of wasting my time, God started telling me to get working on something I've always been inclined to do. Write. But how Lord? and Where? There are sites everywhere online, and as soon as I'd go to one site, I'd follow a link and be distracted and hours would go by and I still hadn't accomplished anything of value, except downloading all kinds of things my computer really couldn't handle nor does it need. I just couldn't seem to figure out how to start. And that, is where I found my start! I googled, 'how to write online",, and I came up to a site called "ehow". It's all about writing short articles about 'how to' do things. I was intrigued. I wondered, could I do this. I've never written anything to publish, yet I kept going back to that sight. I wondered, could I use it for the Lord's purposes also? How could I work God into my 'ehow' articles. I realized then,that I didn't have to have his name in all my articles, His Name is on my page, in my profile, in my lifestyle. He's woven into the very fabric of my being. So I began. Scared, fingers stumbling over the keyboard, dictionary on one side of me, thesaurus on the other. Magazines and books piled up by my computer. I had so many ideas for writing, it was almost overwhelming in itself. I asked my children for ideas on 'how to ' do things articles, and they would text me this idea or that, and then I would take off on it, research some information online, and just write. I've only been doing it for a few weeks now, but I see God pushing me all along to this point in my life. I can see his hand closing doors, and opening new doors. I can see now, what I thought of as a 'set-back' a true new beginning. I'm so excited by all the things He's filling my head with.... it is finally my season in life, I realize He has given me many experiences that have been good, bad, and ugly, yet, in due time, ultimately God has been guiding me to this path. Thank you Lord for allowing what I called a 'set-back' to be a very exciting new door . I'll write more later, and keep up a journal about various aspects of my life. Come along if you like, you'll find a real human being behind the words, someone who's tried and failed, and won some and lost some, yet the sum of my life so far has been ever believing, and faithful. Let's journey together, you'll learn alot about what can happen in 32 years of marriage. God is so good. Goodnight now.